Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
Buying beer for freshmen. No matter what they ask for, I'm getting them Colt 45.
just had sex with a midget and didnt wrap it... were totally gonna have a tv show :)
They're donating plasma together for extra money. Couple of the fucking century.
Also there's a dick sized hole in my tights...should I be worried?
Thank you for calling me on to a higher level of debauchery. fuck anyone who says we aren't good for each other
it says 'tasty bitch' in sharpie on my tits...
after you left he started opening his bottles by smashing the neck against the edge of the fireplace and pouring beer into his mouth. it was about the manliest thing ive ever seen. its probably how lumberjacks open their beers... if they didnt have their axes handy.
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
Can we make love to the Space Jam soundtrack?
I have drunkenly angered a family of raccoons. Please send help immediately.
I'm glad he doesn't have a bigger dick because he'd just use it for evil anyway
Well I'm trying out this whole "not sleep with a stranger thing"
That's silly... just silly. And by silly I mean unrealistic.
The sex was so good we high-fived after.
Randomize
