Whats the glycemic index on semen?
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
You thought last year was bad... a guy dressed as a clown showed up with cocaine
I need to figure out how to tell my doctor that I don't want to fix my possible fertility problems until AFTER I'm done whoring around in my 20s.
Just found a peacock feather in my car. Should I be the least bit concerned about this?
My living room is scattered with glow sticks wrappers, sparklers, face paint & beer cans?
It's not as cool looking when the drugs wear off, is it?
My 7 yo sister is trying to talk my mom into buying her a strawberry margarita. Happy Cinco de Mayo.
Happy you have kids and I don't day!
She kept calling herself DJ McDonalds and said she wanted to make some Egg McMusic.
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
Nothing kills the mood quicker than kneeing him in the face during sex
I AM A GOOD PERSON AND THEREFORE I DESERVE QUALITY DICK!
TELL HER ABOUT THE GODDAMNED MOTHERFUCKING POTATOES
I do not recommend playing football on LSD like at all
Randomize
