shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
is there any particular reason you took a shit in a zip lock bag and left it in my refrigerator?
I woke up this morning with gum gluing my ass cheeks together..
I can't decide if I actually want to know or not..
Defiantly just threw away our yearly bottle collection in front of the campus tour. The school should pay me for recruitment
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
I mean, once you help another girl drunker than you zip her jeans you can't help but be friends after that
I had to rush to my room and get my vibrator off my bed i didn't want him to know how long it's been since I had a decent fuck.
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
Standing in a circle of girls fistpumping to the word "hospital" while taking shots.... I don't see this ending well, but its fucking fun.
Stop leaving me alone with my ex boyfriends after keg challenges. Woke up in his bed covered in what you think would be cum. No...toothpaste. He left a note. "Be home at four. Don't be here when I get back."
captain cockblock got me again last night so i put a squirrel in his room and jamed the door shut
I am drinking fireball and apple juice out of a sippy cup like a fucking toddler.
LET ME HAVE MY JUDGMENT OF OTHER PEOPLE
I don't think meeting his drug dealers counts as a relationship landmark.
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
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