You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
on of the only things i remember was the security guard told me i was too drunk for laser tag.
You left your underwear on the fireplace
I AM TEN TEQUIA SHOOTS ON AND I JUST SAW SOMEONE DO A BODY SHOT OFFF OF JESUS
THIS FEELS SO WROG AND OH SO RIGHT
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
Meant to have fun, ended up giving speech about consent to guy at bar. Feminist side feels happy. Orgasms side feels confused and betrayed.
We may not see eye-to-eye on much, but I'm definitely willing to let you see eye-to-vagina again.
I may quit my job to go be a costumed Jedi at Disneyland.
your girlfriend showed us your homemade porn last night.
Well, he hasn't actually seen me naked. Just my boobs... and the left side of my vagina.
We almost ended up sober because of u!!
I'm about to make existential crisis tacos.
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
I just realized I'm not wearing clothes. I think my pants may be in the kitchen but I have no idea where my shirt is. I'm kinda worried.
Randomize
