I'm too stoned for this. I'm Canadian.
Is showing up wearing the condom a bit presumptus
well he's currently spooning the coffee table
I just found her phone in the quesadilla maker...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
Why the fuck is the royal wedding at 4am. That is obviously not the most appropriate time to drink during finals. It's like I'm bound to fail, by royal decree.
I love being Chipotle's first beer sale of the morning.
It's gotten to the point that the dirty talk in my head when I touch myself has your accent
At what point would you like us to save you from yourself?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he asked me to lick his asshole and I told him his girlfriend could do that for him
You rope them in with the looks and the boobs, and I'll bore them into submission with random trivia. We can't lose.
I threw up in my room. And I cleaned it up with a spatula.
His dick is magical but I don't want to die in this blizzard do you see my dilemma
You are cordially invited to the annual finals week stress relief drinking binge at our manor this evening
Nobody on Tinder wants to give you a Blumpkin.
Randomize