Jon and Kate are totally playing with my emotions.
i mean i care more about their marriage then my own parents
had another sex dream about alec baldwin...
Jason Williams (yeah the ex-nets center...) drunkenly told me that, while drinking, I should take an ambien and a cialis before i go home...that will "give me a 25 minute window to have sex and then goto sleep before the bitch starts bothering me"....
please just be careful, i just switched my facebook status to "in a relationship", i would look really pathetic if i had to change it back to "single" already
In less than 3 minutes we had 3 security guards running after us
She called picking up at 2pm a matinee drug deal.
Dude, I think someone on your skype account may have seen me beat off. I used your computer and didnt realize you were still signed in. Please tell me no one was on...
This is a pre-sorry for hitting on and then sleeping with you're ex
Passing out on a toilet is not classy no matter what you're wearing. Not even a pea coat.
I guess I just stopped wanting to rip his balls out and started being okay with him being alive. that's a typical feeling for exes right?
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
So the guy I hooked up with during welcome week just tried to booty call me from across the lecture hall at 9am. I don't think he gets how this works...
Last night I dreamt that I sold my car and used the money to have wheels surgically implanted in my feet and legs so I became a human heely and I just rolled everywhere
I feel like I beer bonged a ton of asbestos
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
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