was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
this is never going to happen for me, I think he thinks I'm crazy
well you did scream "PLEASE! I'LL S YOUR D IN FRONT OF EVERYONE"
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
I cant help but love a girl who informs me of the pregnancy test results by emailing me a YouTube clip of Barney Stinsons not a fathers day speech.
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The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
i think he just broke into a bike shop his last text said something about hiding in some tree
i'm about to say screw it and get drunk in the hotel by myself
It's 2 pm, at least sit by the pool...
im still going. this is my new reality. also. dont take glowsticks in the bath. they explode. actually. do. it. its beautiful.
i dont think thats healthy man...
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Gonna send a picture of my negative pregnancy test with the message "Merry Christmas" to the guys I've been sleeping with. That alone, will put a huge dent in my shopping list of gifts for people.
Drank a beer through my butt, how's your initiation going?
I hope our bodies realize that workaholics starts tomorrow and will be well enough to handle the hell we are going to put them through. amen.
I literally paid cover, got kicked out. Tried to explain that I was just clumsy, but mispronounced it. Then I got pissed off, stormed out..and clotheslined myself on a velvet rope. How was your night?
I mean, on what planet are nipples suppose to look like that?
I kinda just want to steal him and keep him forever
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