Drinking non-alcoholic beer is like going down on your cousin.
Sure it tastes the same, but it ain't right.
btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
I swear if I see one more guy in a v-neck and fedora I'm going to punch someone in the balls. This is philly, you're not supposed to look like Ryan Cabrera
He adopted an old drug sniffing dog so that he won't lose his weed around the house anymore. It works.\n
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
All I need is the Internet and a place to drink.
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
I'm drinking nothing but vodka and coffee for the next 48 hours. For science.
My fake id got more birthday sex than I've had in my life.
High me just had to pick the lock on my sisters room because I locked my vodka in there. I love vacation.
all of these bad things happened because I didn't bring a shower beer.
I got home at 1 am on a weeknight with lube in my hair. I'd say it was a successful first date.
went out to hit golf balls, ended up doing splits at the bar. you're a bad influence.
I guess I'm famous. Hot lesbian was WARNED about me. Still hooked up with her.
I'll pay you to teach me.
fyi: first time in five days i havent washed my birth control down with liquor. when are we going out tonight?
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