You told him how lucky he was to be an elephant and kept trying to grab his "trunk"
Woke up this morning to my mom on the phone with my dad saying, "It's probably just your prostate." Reasons to move out. Go.
also since I use google voice my ads in gmail switched to DUI services after this conversation
I almost bumped into a man wrapped only in a blanket at 10 am
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How drunk is "too drunk" for candlelight service?
They tried to dine n dash at dennys and the waiter jumped on their car and broke their windshield
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
They have a house rule that you get a composite for every 5 guys you sleep with. Where should I hang my new one?
apparently while i was high i thought that putting a dinosaur temporary tattoo on my inner thigh would keep me from taking my pants off and having sex with him...
...it didn't...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My dick has a subreddit
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
Feel weird saying this on Facebook, but a dildo collecting demigod sounds like somebody I'd at least hang with for a minute.
Why can't they just let me be the gorgeous cum dumpster that I know I'm meant to be?
If you can't trust the person at the taco cabana drive thru, who can you trust?!
DUDE NEVER CALL THE COPS BACK
Randomize