I wannas sexs uuuuu
i just ate that cheese stick that was in my purse from last night.
its amazing how hard it is to tell vomit from stuffing the day after
i just found a cheeto on my floor and ate it. i might still be drunk.
It's gotten to the point where NOT peeing in the sink feels strange and uncomfortable.
i feel like everytime i say im going to quit drinking someone comes along with a better idea about drinking
did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement"
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
we couldn't find any funnels so we taped a spaghetti strainer to a pool noodle and it worked fairly well
He rolled up to the party in an ice cream truck. He was definitely my first priority
I couldn't stop laughing at the fact he was cutting lines with a sears card. What 24 year old has a sears card?
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
Snow days are when you really appreciate that your neighbor is on your bang roster.
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
Best night if my life? Time I got eaten out in the backseat of a M5 while eating White Castle. Then he fucked me. Perfect
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