everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
Do you think we're allowed to sign male strippers into the building with a valid id?
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
he's home with a concussion now...but apparently i'm still the highlight of his freshman year
thanks for not telling him i named my trumpet after his dick
I'm going to give blood tomorrow. Prepare yourself for pictures and a cynical poem about the heart and its level of tangibility.
I was behind him snuggling, I told him I was the big spoon and he told me I was too little it was more like he was wearing a backpack.
I was so gone I thought the cops banging on my door were kids from the party trying to get into my room... needless to say, I started moaning louder so they would take the hint.
He put those pics of him with those girls on facebook and tagged his wife in them
Tequila 1 marriage 0
Can we go to the gas station to get cigarettes before we get drunk. It's hard enough to say Marlboro sober.
Side note, i did some manscaping and now my farts sound way different
I knew deleting his texts was a bad idea and I was right. I just used the last time we talked to help me figure out when I had my last period
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
Are you texting me while pooping again?
I'm also playing fetch with the dog
Randomize
