You work out of a Hotel?
I think im in love with that girl with the googlie eyes last night. She was looking in my eyes and at my dick at the same time. we are going out again tonight.
heey were did you guys go? last time i remember seeing you i was throwing up in the fountain
You ruined his night from a different state? Impressive.
Well that wasnt the exboyfriend i expected to hook up with today
No more drinking with Em. She was on the ground so much she looked like she belongs in a lifealert commercial
The chlamydia really affected his face.
Whiskey??
It will be at least another 6 weeks before I say yes again. I'm bruised. I stole sex cards and a really nice pocket knife. I acquired a vial of my own blood. Talk about a yard sale...
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
Some girl at my gym just tried to casually drop the fact she can kegel 3 lbs...
That rando I gave head to on the beach just endorsed me on LinkedIn for Oral Communication Skills. So there's that.
A person can only vomit Fireball so much before they quit it forever
learned the hard way that breakfast jack daniels is a lot stronger than lunch or dinner jack daniels.
You went to pound town last night and chow town this morning. Boy you need a passport.
I sent him home with blood on his fingers and shame in his heart.
Randomize
