Theyre still fighting about whether its called america or the united states.
Do you think if Santa was real that he's have a big penis?
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
I AM OVULATING LIKE A STEAM ENGINE.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The guy in front of me got in the club with his green card, that's awesome
i preemptively threaten to cock slap your kids if they are snobby yuppy bitches
Get this. Chipped my front tooth taking a sip of a gay mans beer out of my cleavage. Fuck my fucking life. that'll be fun to explain to my dentist
Two word: claymation porn. Think about it.
I don't think I can ever express my appreciation for the things you text me.
Dude. I legit missed class because I got too engrossed in the porn I was watching. Also I need to figure out how to get as flexible as these chicks. Some of the positions they do are outrageous.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
Her roommate was talking on her cell when I came out of the bedroom and I definitely heard her describe how shitty and terrified I looked. Awesome.
I'm in the line at Chipotle thinking: "What combo will best prepare my body for the open bar I'm going to subject it to tonight?"
I would say that that is the last time I ever drink a bottle of jack in two hours, but really who am I kidding?
Is talking to an iron man poster a good or bad indicator that you've been drinking too much?
Nothing like ripping open the box with your keys on a sat R train and throwing back the morning after pill with some coconut water on my way to work at a fitness studio for free
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