"you've got the devil in yuh. the curse of Jesus is coming on your sex soon." That's what a homeless guy just told me.
Babe! I just farted and I swear to jesus lord christ that it sounded like ur name! Ok, more like Meeatt but still... awesome.
If we keep treating our bodies like amusement parks we have another 10 years left at best.
Can I use you as a job reference? Don't tell them i got you fired cause I banged you tho
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we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
the only human I can compare her to is rosie o'donnell.
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
My only downfall is that I can only take shots in twos.
You pretty much isn't said it
Those words don't go together.
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I will take a blow job from a dude that kinda looks like a girl at this point
Im pretty sure my housekeeper high fived her on the way out this morning
But he has cupcakes AND I'm guaranteed an orgasm. .. I feel like I shouldn't even have to actually make a decision here.
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
Just shaved my crotch so I could call it the bald eagle. Happy 4th.
This might be the worst thing you've ever done.
Really? I feel like I've done worse. Guess I gotta step my game up.
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