Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
When I was her age, Pluto was still a planet... but i said what the hell
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Now they're talking about doing whiskey shots since they're flipping the turkey over. You might need to drive me home.
First Thanksgiving as a grown up: My step dad had to take my brother (who still smells like booze) and I both to our cars this morning, apparently we were at the same bars (same stamps), & I think I broke my elbow. Im thankful to be alive & not incarcerated.
dude this night sums up my single life. naked, crying, and covered in honey. i need to get laid.
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
There's nothing quite like having a little 8 year old boy hand me a Bible on campus while I'm on my way to the health center because of my recent slutty tendencies.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sware then you fell into me doing a Tarzan swing thing and my margherita spilled and shattered all over this guy and sice you were on the ground you tried to pull it off by twerking on the floor lmfao
be right there i have to get my cape
How are you feeling?
I mean, shattered dignity aside, not bad.
I feel sorry for the person who's phone number is 704-1776 cause from now on I'm giving that number to every guy I never wanna talk to again. Happy Independence Day
I'm not dropping acid and watching game of thrones with you. That just sounds like a disaster waiting to happen.
Welcome to your 30’s, where every one night stand is most likely with someone’s father
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