grinding to god bless the USA? really?
shut up
He gave a passionate hug to every tree on the way to my car.
He was drunk at Denny's at 5 am saying how Dear John was the worst movie he has ever seen... eyes filled with tears.
Listening to Joy Division and applying for Walmart. You get to choose which one is more depressing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
... Already stepped in vomit and got a dirty look from a fat in a neck brace
You have all of her herpes and none of my sympathy
So you met him?
More like I walked in on him, drunk, naked, and doing "bathtub yoga". Please stop bringing your dates home.
See what happens chris. I told u not to invite her over. Now shes on her way to jail and were stuck with two pomeranians.
I think Vodka is my favorite. Everything else ties for second.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
New year means new boundaries for the Brazilian lady.. I'm pretty sure I got wax on my asshole
I just woke up under my desk. Not to worry though, no one is in the office yet
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
Like pizza and mermaids make up about 1/3 of my thoughts on the weekends.
Btw that $18 I gave you to run around outside naked came out of your wallet.
She's like a cask of Amontillado. Very tempting if I was drunk, but sober, I know I'll get fucked over in the end.
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