Hallmark should totally make "congratulations on getting your period" cards...I feel they would be quite popular.
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
The police are arresting two women who got in a fight for the last Twilight DVD at Best Buy. Classic.
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
I don't know if it's the amount i drank last night or the number of taylor swift statuses on facebook but i feel like puking everywhere
It was a cry at the bar alone type of night, served with a side of passing out facedown in my nachos.
Tomorrow night wont work for me. I'm talking with Bryan about marriage and I dont want to have a shroom hangover.
This is the moment in my life where I take a fork in the "nice guy" road ive traveled for 23 years and fuck everything in sight that doesnt have herpes, or is in-between flare ups and I don't know about it until my dick is on fire.
I will always remember that night by waking up in that tablecloth the next morning
I'm sorry for not being sorry about whatever shit I did to you when you were annoying and I was drunk. That is all.
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
I'm going to book club and then I'm going to get laid. Being in your 20s ain't so bad sometimes.
I didn't want dick. I wanted spaghetti.
We ran out of vodka, so instead of body shots you wanted to do cupcake shots off her naked body...happy birthday to you.
fell asleep while jerking off ln. woke up to my hand in my pants and my cat crawling all over me
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