honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
We found an eightball on the ground last night. I mean, really, who does that?
This girl just stopped in the middle of a sentence because of my blue eyes. She said she got lost in them. I am laying pipe tonight.
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You do realize that we got a stripper to do the YMCA for us on the main stage... Right?
The cop was more concerned with the fact I had cowboy boots on with shorts than the fact we were under age
You missed me roundhouse kicking a lit glow stick out of a guy's mouth last night. You would have been proud.
It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.
Dude it was bad... like you fell asleep around the toilet after drinking from the back tank bad.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I didn't know where you were for like 15 minutes and then I went in the bathroom splashing water on the mirror and throwing hand towels around saying that you were "redecorating"
Apparently, Lolla sends you an email every time you use your wristband to buy a beer.
21 new emails...yikes
I'm rolling and just noticed that the thread count on these sheets is horrendous.
Drunk me left sober me a shower beer in expectation of Hurricane Harvey. Drunk me is the best.
Should I rub the neighbors amazon package in the dog shit they left on the front steps?
New one isn't as good asmy ex. She won't put her tongue up my butt
Peter this is your "ex"
I stand by what i said
Randomize