I don't care if he is my ex... I have the deed to his dick until someone else fucks him. We broke up 2 years ago.... I am still holding that deed!
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
In attempts to Not be THAT GIRL in front of my new crush I will only drink a 12 pack instead of my normal case.
I shall celebrate this moment with a beer conveniently located in the sock drawer directly to the right of me.
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
he was wearing a tuxedo, i was naked...it's a long story.
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
Um please remind me to tell you what happened tonight. It involves wine, pain killers and firing a handgun in our apartment. Legit might be hiding from the cops this weekend.
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
I'm just gonna use that pot butter as dip for chips. That's fat, American AND stoner!
I want falafel more than sex right now. That's really saying something for me...
Is it appropriate to send an apology gift to his roommates for breaking the bathroom sink during crazy sex?
I accidently sent a dick pic to the group chat with her family. Right after they all said it was a pleasure having me for dinner. Wana drink with me?
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
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