Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
His body is like Jesus fingering me while I eat birthday cake
i asked if you wanted help changing your sheets after you threw up in bed. you politely declined. i take no responsibility after that.
There were 4 naked women demanding my presence. Of COURSE I got into the pool.
So apparently when he was telling people he was in Alaska for 6 months he was actually in jail
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
he kept doing his monologue, "if a vagina could talk."
Dude. Zebras have bad attitudes.
I just wanted to share with you that my life has come to naked arts and crafts, to fix my flask, with a rum and coke in my hand... Good luck on your exam
Hahah fuck. I keep looking to make sure that stupid line doesn't show up when my guards are down. Babies can sense fear.
Straight up asked lady in a lime green jumpsuit how to make your ass clap. That thing wiggled more beautifully than ocean waves at sunset
My tinder date had to be home by 8:30 cause she's on house arrest.
She can't even plan ahead to have toilet paper for her next shit
Every text my dad sends me is an AA mantra. Might be time to take a look at my life.
not sure if actually covered in glitter or just drunk
Randomize
