they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
What's the rule on cocaine before dinner?
Its 11 o'clock somewhere
I should have questioned it early on when they said bring beer and chocolate syrup
Me focusing on not shitting my pants is keeping me awake.
Ended up getting hot boxed in a limo with a bunch of asians going to a karaoke bar. I think I pretended to understand their language for a solid hour. Am I bilingual now?
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
Did we really just set fireworks off in a cemetery? Or was that a dream?
I think so and I think we were sober.
I have to masturbate tonight while watching every Paul Walker movie ever made. It's what he would have wanted. RIP Paul.
dude, I felt like being high in a Santa hat and eating five boxes of cookies was right for today.
It's the third day of class and I got told I smell like a distillery.
I didn't have any lime for my chaser.. so after my shot I ate a handful of lime flavored chips. Didn't work so great.
She swallowed the car key because she thought we were really going to make her drive.
Theres a free llama on craigslist. Are you in or are you in?
Randomize
