He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
buying booze in bulk is always a bad idea. i wish there was some direct deposit-like system
Got one of only two perfect scores in the class on the quiz I took drunk. This is not a good thing for me to have learned about myself.
Ya,, he does have virgin eyes. Thats a real thing you know...
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
Postcard from jail please. Reserving a spot on my fridge.
I'm stranded in the Hampton area. Looks like I'm going to have to take one for the team and pass out by this applebees.
Your cock is gonna weep like a baby
I JUST WANT TO HAVE MILDLY SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE SEX WITH HIM AND CALL HIM CUPCAKE.
We mailed him an 18 inch double headed dildo for his birthday. The Fedex guys certainly got a laugh out of it.
Just bailed on her the best way possible. Got tickets to the game. Only issue is.... if we lose, we not only lost, but I skipped sex to watch us lose
After that time I came to the conclusion that jeeps are the best cars to have sex in
Money making scheme, blow job proof mascara. Waterproof is bullshit
Just looked at my bank statement. 9 out of 10 transactions on the first page were from 9 different bars. The 10th was for birth control pills at the pharmacy. I need to rethink my lifestyle.
Randomize
