I didn't realize how hung over I was until I rolled over and the world rolled over with me.
What I lack in compassion I make up for in lack of compassion
She told you broke her computer after the little square in tetris wouldn't rotate for you...
this one can actually spell my name, that's a shoe-in
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he literaly had industrial grade plastic underneth his blankets
Jon thought he was that blonde chick from Three's Company when he was shrooming
You screamed at all of us and then showed us your sack. You're like the boyfriend of my dreams.
Don't mean to be rude. But did you, by any chance, cut down a tree from my neighbors backyard last night? And did you also drag it to my yard and burn it?
she just blew up the empty bag of wine and used it as a floatation device.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think we should go through the tsa checkpoint with raging hardons when we go through LAX. I think we should pass out some viagra to everyone
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
I don't know, I think having hemorrhoids shows character. You have to be trying pretty hard to get them.
This Christmas I would like to thank Jesus for cocaine.
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
idk what to be more embarrassed/confused about, that i lost my underwear or that i woke up covered in fried rice
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