It was like if Side-show Bob had a vagina for a mouth
When he took off his pants i accidently shouted "that is one small wiener," and thats when he left
you'd think someone with a dick that small would take what he could get
I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
Somehow I managed to make my Dunkin Donuts uniform look slutty. And I'm not even wearing hoops.
It's official, I've know hooked up with everyone I carpooled with in middle school
you were cooking a hot pocket with a grill lighter what did you want me to do
just found $310, wrapped in a rubber band, at the bottom of my sock drawer with a note attached stating, "Make it rain".
I mean we had sex in a crib. You tell me how my night was.
The least you could do before I go into your room is throw away the condom wrapper from the other girl I know you're banging.
ok is that genuinely the first four bars of mozart's symphony #40 sharpied onto my arm or
And know that if I ever text "road head?" that it comes from a place of caring and not a place of heartlessness..
I apologized to him for my lack of boobs after he felt me up
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
this is the last time i am going to a 7am booty call
My hairdresser won’t do keratin treatments because of the toxins, but will put ecstasy up her butt at festivals...
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