clay aiken is like melissa ehteridge without the guitar.
sunday morning discovery: something purple, smelly, and sticky my hair. any suggestions?
And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
the day after is always just damage control
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
You've eaten a Lean Pocket for every meal for at LEAST 3 days now. Get your life in line.
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
I took my shirt off and stood in the kitchen for an hour and a half talking to his parents about my tattoos
They're letting me teach a freshman-laden class now. This university needs better background checks.
I need to beat up a magician now. BRB.
I just realized I haven't got laid since the last time the Browns won.
Getting food poisoning after eating at work was the cherry on top of my "Welcome back to real life" sundae.
What did we do last night and why in the fuck were there carrots in my pocket?
I wish I had a tail.
Why?
...why not?
Randomize
