My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
if I'm ever single again, I swear to god I'm going to have 87 venerial diseases
the best part is my dad got arrested for the same thing at the same bar 30 years ago... so he cant be mad
Down at cameli's and some homeless dude just pulled out a taser. Awesome.
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He fell asleep in the strip club and they paid some stripper $20 to sit on his face until he woke up.
you looked at me, pointed to a car and silently said "the elephant parks here".
hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by
he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
I hooked up with a British man... Wiz Khalifa has your bra... Couldn't have been a more successful night!
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I didn't know your ex looked like a male Khloe Kardashian?
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
I'm about to have a threesome at the hotel where I had my quinceañera. Becoming a woman under this roof for the second time, whaaat
WINE AND FILM. TALK ABOUT AN UPGRADE FROM NETFLIX AND CHILL.
i woke up between my boyfriend and his sister and i don't know if we fucked or cried together
I think he just shit his pants. Yep he did. That's unfortunate.
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