woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
The fact that I woke up with my panties on the counter and a piece of pizza stuck in my sheets is what scares me.
If I brought two seashells to Lowe's, do you think that they'd drill two holes in each shell for me? I need to be a mermaid on Saturday...
I think if I set up a series of baby gates up the stairs each one more difficult to undo then the last that should be able to stop your drunk vagina.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Let's just not urinate on things that don't need to be urinated on
The cab driver just showed us a POV shot of himself getting ridden by a chick he took with his flip phone. Confirmed not taken in cab. Gonna be a good night...
I rigged together two of my vibrators for more power... I've created a monster.
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
Lets get coked out and steal a parrot this summer
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
I woke up in a bunk bed beside two Brazilians dude you have no idea how happy I was
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
He noticed my new Lipstick so later tonight it's going to be on his dick.
He's stripped out of his boxers and is dancing and slapping his dick with string cheese...I don't know whether to call for help or take a video.
Im 76 percent sure I took a fully clothed shower last night.
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