She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
tonight i'm making a christmas tree shaped shot pyramid
10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
Um I just overheard that the new guy spent a month in jail. Obvi another great hire.
Just woke up. Need to shower and fuck. Be there when I'm done disappointing. Should be 30.
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
some bitch filled my sink with salsa.
Hillary is trying to make pickle pops with vodka and sell them to kids at the ball park.
Dude. Why is there a hamster in my pocket? WHAT THE FUCK WAS IN THAT JOINT
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
In two unrelated events today I have had frostbite on my toe and cum up my nose. Who says life stops when you get married?
He propositioned me for a threesome once so yeah I'd say he has what it takes to run for public office
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
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