took him home. told him i would rock his world. passed out. a for effort f for follow thru
Have you ever noticed that nowhere is the same thing as now here, i get my best ideas when i smoke
some people wear their heart on their sleeve but you just wear your vagina on your face.
I dont care how high you are, meat and sprinkles dont mix dude
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At the party. I feel like I just walked into a lifesize blunt.
After i black out, be a good friend and point me to the direction of a girl with daddy issues, any girl would do just fine
Nothing gets you judged faster than having cum in your hair at the gas station.
We just taught the Brazilian how to smoke out of a vuvuzela.
What alcohol should i drink Saturday to completely hate life?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Am I under any obligation to let my new fuck buddy know I slept with his little sister?
I have got to move on from this "sleeping with every drug dealer I meet" phase.
I ask him how he's going, like life and stuff, and he responds "20-0 pats"
Man, I'm real high and googling what all my favorite figure skaters from childhood are doing now.
Her hot older sister walked in on us, looked me up and down, then stared straight at her and said "I call sloppy seconds on this one" then left. I'm still debating on how I feel about that.
When we were in Vegas he tried to get an Elvis impersonator to act dead on a toilet so he could take photos. This is even worse
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