My professor really needs to stop abbreviating. I'll never remember what "Fun. Anal. Trade-offs?" means when i study.
I'm not upset with you; I'm upset with Fox News.
Sorry if I'm being weird. I'm dipping doritos in cabernet.
Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
Rumble strips road head = magical
HIS TAN HAS PUT ME TO SHAME. HE TOOK HIS PANTS OFF AND HIS DICK LOOKED LIKE A GHOST
Tell me when you get here. I'm drinking beer in the bushes next to your house, and I put my hoodie up because I was cold. Pretty sure everyone lowkey thinks i'm homeless.
and then I said "oh, I see the price of Plan B has gone up". and the pharmacist looked at me very sadly. I was just trying to make conversation.
It's 9:07 in the morning and I am so hungover right now I'm about to take the kids I'm babysitting to mf'ing Popeyes bc that's all I want in this world
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
Goodnight Shia. Goodnight Moon.
I just got a robo call from the Addiction Help Line. Not sure how to take that.
So this morning everyone commended me for puking over the porch. No one else made it that far...
Dammit. the window insulation sheets are too small for my windows. Yet again I am disappointed by size
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