Who said anything about talking that was a booty call
I finally had kitchen counter sex! i was so excited
I was in a threesome last night that turned into a violent domestic dispute with damage to a hotel. Wish you were there!
I brought up my Bobbly Flay drinking game in the interview. Of course I got the job.
Everytime I know she spent a lot of time on her hair for one of our dates, I intentionally cum on the top of her head. That's how she knows I pay attention.
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
You should make a checklist to ensure they are quality material. Here's mine: wearing shoes, not drunk, very hot, has teeth, speaks english. You never know
Stay positive! You think people like sad vaginas? NO! You'll get some!
WTF. I was 99% sure I went straight home last night. I just woke up hugging a chair, and my tux pocket has a flask filled with what I think is red bull and gatorade. This has to be your doing.
Last night I had a dream that I changed my last name to Vodka. what does that say about my life?
Woke up in a house I don't know, with someone else's pants on, and wolverine hair, to my girlfriend yelling on the phone about the 4 girls I made out with last
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
when I said eat the rich I didn't mean like that but here we are sucking that capitalist dick
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
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