their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
I least I know I can't get pregnant because it's on my hair
That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
The lack of pants and amount of productivity in my life right now is amazing.
She called me her ex's name in a supermarket. How boring am I that she livens up shopping by thinking of another guy?
Chasing bourbon with pepto... Dedication.
You also once spent an entire hour explaining the origin of the strip steak to me.
I keeping finding meatballs in random places
I've officially dedicated my newly single life to making myself squirt.
I bet your mom's never met a girl who's thrown up at the presidential inauguration before though.
I gave her two orgasms and then we laid there and she ate jelly beans out of my belly button...that girls a keeper
gave out my moms phone number instead of mine last night... thattttttttttttttt dunk.
If wanting to text you my feelings after three mojitos is wrong I don't wanna be right.
Watching South Park, doing sit-ups and drinking tequila. In other words, my night is going pretty good.
Randomize
