You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
In honor of tonight, my penis will make an appearance
Im watching he's just not that into you, eating way too much pizza, and feeling very single.
...seriously? chocolate pudding? motorboating? No one has even done that to ME and i am 69 times the whore you are
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
I love Japanese schoolgirls with short skirts riding bikes on windy days.
You're never coming back, are you?
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
He needs to seriously stop texting me at 3am for sex. Late night and early morning hours are for the guys who DON'T bust a nut in the first 5 minutes of making out.
Yeah minute men are best for late afternoons when you're inbetween running errands and have nothing to do.
It's like a booty call, except its for tacos...and you're my brother.
Get up, biotch, before I come traipsing in there to rip apart whatever god-forsaken spoon you have going on between the two of you and your dog.
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
be right there i have to get my cape
The Domino's delivery guy is in front of me at The Wendy's drive-through. Hmmm.....
The guy I slept with in AZ just called and is moving here next week.
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
Randomize
