Every time we go downtown I ask myself why we live in Des Moines
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
he rubbed his balls on my face to wake me up.. this friends with benefits thing is getting out of hand.
Is percocet and coffee considered a balanced breakfast?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If you see my mugshot on the news tomorrow, its not what you think
Also I have uncooked pasta. I was hoping that could get cooked at your place. Don't ask about the circumstances that I came into ownership of uncooked pasta
I folded my dollar bills into mustaches in preparation for our trip to the strip club
He just texted me saying "you've got a face that suggests you give really good head". Is this a compliment? Do I say thanks?
I keep getting the feeling him and his friends are hilarious and we should drink whiskey together forever
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Some dude peed on tonys floor because drunkness
They offered him a bucket as he was peeing and he was like "Nah, I'm good"
I feel like my dick pic collection should be archived at the Smithsonian
I'm too high and old for this...
Freshly fucked must agree with my hair cause I've gotten compliments on it this afternoon
He's here walking around DRUNK AS FUCK in a Kobe Bryant number 8 jersey... Tucked in.
Just cuz u chase vodka with sweet tea doesn't make it sweet tea vodka
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