it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
I saw his package. It spoke to me.
I can hear my fat mexican neighbor yelling "do you like that!" ...I hope its not his dog
So I had to explain to her that pussy doesn't mean a cat
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
Just so everyone's clear, it was already on fire when I got there.
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
Kegstand on crutches, you need to get on my level.
pretend your vagina is a choco taco and the guy is someone who really loves choco tacos. let him enjoy the choco taco.
I left your tip in your mailbox. Last night was amazing.
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
On the upside, no one went to the hospital! Lex's friend was definitely on fire at one point last night though because he tried to juggle tiki torches. He was shirtless this morning and smelled like a BBQ.
Is 28 too old to get fingered in Centennial Park? Asking for a friend.
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
Randomize
