I figured girls wouldn't be down to sleep w/ a guy who plugged a pregnant chick
Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
I just remembered we said the Lord's Prayer before we went out last night.
He felt like a one man threesome
I probably shouldn't have slept with him. I feel like that may have given him the wrong idea.
I just asked the contractor building my house what it would cost to put a garbage disposal in all the shower drains...there was a lot of judging going on.
She came over and gave me a handy and then just lingered for a day and a half. Worst weekend ever.
Bring a bathing suit for the glitter slip n slide
Is it too early to say this year has been a blur?
Finishing last nights 1.5L of wine and beef jerky for breakfast. Work looms, ever the prickly bitch.
A man just squeezed past me in a tight space and said, "Excuse us."
Come here I'm naked
And I want mozzarella sticks
My ex husband is now my side piece. #thisis30
listen. i haven't sucked a dick in well over three years but i believe in myself.
I really love you. Like, more than tequila...& we both know that's my favorite.
Randomize
