Dude, I would hit that so hard that whoever could pull me out would become the king of England
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
you know its a sad night when you can actually see and hear sitcoms on at the bar
There are going to be so many Snookis this Halloween that I might just dress as the guy that hit her and punch them all in the face
all i care about is the story behind my toaster ending up in the microwave
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
Lots of alcohol last night skiing this morning = me throwing up off chairlift
The trash can in my living room is full of Popsicle sticks and my vibrator has taken up permanent residence on my coffee table. I'm not doing anything productive. Clearly.
You would only karaoke to Spanish songs, but sang with the accent of the french candle stick in beauty and the beast.
I'm sorry I put my balls through your watch. On another note your roommate had them on his shoulder too sry
I'm determined to sit on that face.
The condoms have been found. I repeat: THE CONDOMS HAVE BEEN FOUND. he isn't a collector!!!
I'm glad that we laid to rest the suspicion that he was keeping them in a scrapbook. yayy
I let a drunk straight girl spank me with a metal paddle at the bar tonight. Remind me to never do that again.
Omg I should get on tinder just to get some edibles in town
I wasnt 2 drunk i sobered up around the time we were shooting the fire extinguishers
Randomize
