Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
Just spun two beer bottles and Placed them in my pockets perfect... I feel like the clint eastwood of drunks
Yo, if someone calls you asking for John Stamos, just go with it.
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
DON'T BE A PUSSY. ONLY 1/3 OF THE WORDS IN YOUR LAST TEXT WERE MISSPELLED, WHICH MEANS YOU NEED 2/3 MORE SHOTS.
I should probably file for unemployment. Sometime between last night and 4 AM I facebooked my manager the lyrics to hoe by ludacris. I'm just projecting ahead here.
Ummm. I just wanna say this now: Don't let me invite the band back to the apartment to see my stripper pole.
I think I just saw my 8th grade band teacher trying to pick up a hooker
I have whiskey and jager. There's no telling what kind of monster will emerge
We are not in a rock band. We can't continue living like this.
Yeah I went home with her... She had me take off everything but my shirt and from across the room goes, "Now dance. Just dance that dick over here"
To this day, I regret not having sex in the bathroom
It's a sexual break up. We maintain a friendship and leave any and all sexual attraction out. It's not hard, having a baby is harder than that.
He referred to his penis as "The Purple Headed Yogurt Slinger." I'm both disgusted and turned on
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