these burps are starting to have way more vomit in them,
My boss' voice literally gives me gas
I was in bed at 845. Affairs take a lot out of people
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
How do people deal with hangovers? I literally want to eat my own face.
I feel like we shud celebrate your sisters homecoming by having sex in her room
Just threw up in front of the Boy Scouts on my base. Welcome to the Navy kids.
That's totally the Emoji for "just ran into some girl who knows I know she had an abortion"
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
like when you break up with someone your virginity slowly starts to grow back & when it's done it's like ding ding ding you're ready to date again
You tell anyone I'm rocking out to Pitbull in an economy, base-model car, I'll kill you.
I don't think Buddha would recommend a sexscpade across Mexico
i do my most serious thinking while screwing her. ive pondered everything from quantum physics to the life cycle of a badger. if i keep this up ill have a phd in no time.
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
Randomize
