Reasons why i shouldn't be drunk and upset: i'm going to a boy's
just had wine and brownie batter for dinner. Single life is good
i had choclate birthday cake for breakfast and am currently flossing my teeth w a condom wrapper. at work. hot mess for 200 alex
Omg, looked at my call history, and judging by the times of calls it took me like half hour to walk home frommcds
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
I don't know what's worse the the fact he has worn a protective cup for last 3 years in fear of being kicked in the balls. Or the fact that the one day he decides to throw caution to the wind and doesn't wear it and actually gets kicked in the balls.
Who in tha hell do u hang out with?
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
She was just a sweet cute intern for us until I saw her naked in my bed the day after the Christmas party
How do you tell an ex that banging less hot chicks than me is highly insulting? I almost want to try and get him laid with a pretty girl just to save some face for dating him so long.
People...there is no better feeling in the world than finding out via Google that your ex has a warrant out for his arrest. No better feeling.
He stumbled out of the bathroom with his pants around his ankles yelling "tie my shooes!"
This weekend I turned down sex to watch the Star Wars marathon... Is this growing up?
After an orgasm, I always feel the urge to sing A Whole New World from the move Aladdin and I'm not quite sure why.
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
I just came in my own mouth don't ask me how cuz it really hurt and felt good at the same time.
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