The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
This bar receipt from last night makes no sense
You were wasted and got mad that it was too high so you subtracted 50 bucks in the tip line from the total
I wish that would've worked
you are the weird ass hat to my lady gaga
I feel like my whole life has been one big pre-game for Mexico.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude, I just walked in on your little brother changing clothes...I'm ashamed to say I noticed, but that kid has as MASSIVE cock...
Yeah...we all know. it's the elephant in the room at family gatherings.
that is a frighteningly accurate metaphor for it.
He just told me the blow job I gave him was like a journey
Volunteering at a homeless shelter a bum asked if he could lick me cause I still reeked of whiskey. Being a bumsickle=epic hangover
Girl please we both know I eat his bullshit up like its candy sprinkled with crack
You just jumped of the couch and yelled "hidden tiger crouching dragon!" That's the answer to how you broke your finger.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
Of course I understand. Thou shalt never turn down a free meal or drink. It's one of the commandments of being a girl.
You knocked on your freshman year room door, told the kids who opened it "I own you", and attempted to force-feed them everclear.
She's high and screaming MEREDITH IS A WHORE
I just want him to get into an accident where he's horribly disfigured but otherwise fine so he's not so freaking handsome
Haha do not judge my life style choices right now but me and Dj had sex twice and then he helped me pick an outfit out for my date
Randomize