i knew it was time to break up with him once he pulled out the Halo foreplay costumes
How many 'remember name' entries is it inappropriate to have in one's cell phone?
this blows. i told the guy at the bar that i was the DD and it was like i just announced over megaphone that i had genital herpes. no one will talk to me now.
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there is no way i can order from that cashier at in n out after she tried helping me while i was drunkenly puking in their bathroom at 11 am
im pretty sure this vending machine only exists when im drunk
i left the icescrapper in his bathroom. i dont remember taking it there, but i remember brushing his hair with it.
False alarm I know hes alive because when i tried shaking him awake he pissed his pants and rolled over..
I want to throw pennies on her stage, or just ripping up a dollor bill and throw them one at a time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't trust myself to shower and not drown.
Of course I understand. Thou shalt never turn down a free meal or drink. It's one of the commandments of being a girl.
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
I wanted to write an apology letter to my vagina after that.
Already drunk, almost got in a fight with a bunch of irish chicks. And another with canadians. On my way to get a tattoo. I plan to regret this trip.
Man I can't believe I took a huge dump in a public garden
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