He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
Apparently I look legit enough, cause the 3 bums next to me just got kicked awake by cops, and I was allowed to stay sitting here. That's a plus, right?
I found your twin in sf. His name is ryan. And you are the evil one.
Getting 10 cents back for every can is really just encouraging alcoholism.
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
I have two stamps on my hand....ones from the bar and one is from an aquarium...care to explain?
Woke up in my own bed with a "New Years Eve 2011" bar bracelet on. Both of these things confuse me.
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
I think the guy in front of me just puked in a styrofoam cup.
How do you say "I'm sorry I beat you up while cumming" in German?
I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.
Just described you as looking like "a very cute escapee from an Egyptian insane asylum"
You're talking to someone who was 80% serious about breaking into someone's house and leaving a cat there with our names in a heart tag on its collar
I'm hungover and in a fort. And I hate you.
So many questions
I feel asleep with my contacts in, with my arms wrapped around a bottle of vodka. Also... Do we have class today?
Randomize
