Omg I just drooled on the screen of my phone from smiling with my mouth open while textin bahahahaahah
Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
spring break forecast: sunny with a chance of shitshow
She slept with 4 other guys since we went on a break. And her ex. But apparently she hasn't given any bjs out of respect for me. Why does that comfort me?!
well, the drug dealer I've been fucking the past 5 months gave me a chilis gift card for Christmas, so things are looking up.
Tough to be a good wingman when you puke on yourself and everyone w/in a 5 ft radius at the FIRST bar we go to so don't tell me to step my game up
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
You never know how much you love your bed until you sleep with 4 other people in your car.
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
You said this was your mistake shot and then vomited on the tv. Never forget.
He was tripping his balls off and kept aggressively saying SIT ON MY FACE. 5 hours and countless orgasms later I've decided I must never let this man go.
One time she showed me her pierced nipples in our high school locker room and now she has a daughter
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
Randomize
