1:32a: I quit. signing up for eharmony. Don't judge
so I was thinking like, Rob Pattinson could make so much money whoring himself out dressed as Edward Cullen.
yeah, I mean if he's down to fuck a lot of fat chicks and stare at Tiger Beat posters of himself above the bed...
Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
people who like being in relationships make me feel bad about myself.
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
I would say I'm the man in the relationship but I'm cuddled on the couch eating cake mix and water.
this is what happens when you pick a roommate a year in advance.. she ends up hating you for hooking up with for of her extended family members
I borrowed a glass of wine. And the bottle. Your cat said it was ok
It's a good thing my liver is flexible because a lesser man would be dead
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
I buy a new bowl every time I get a new guy. It's retail therapy.
She asked me if I would fuck her with my storm trooper mask on
Can I make sure all my sluttiness goes to you when I die? You're the only person I know who'll make use of it
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
Randomize
