I have a hot bod, but my face sucks, what can i do?
Walk of shame... his parents made me go to church with them first. in my club top sweat pants and slippers. i just slapped god in the face
I was just on craigslist and saw and ad for a naked yoga instructor. I will no longer be jobless.
I was really disturbed by what initially appeared to be a dismembered head sitting beside you. Then I realized you were laying on her body.
How is it possible that I am in a completely different city, and there are 2 dudes here that I've banged? How????
Remind me again why sleeping with a coworker and his wife would be a terrible idea.
I rode a bull tonight, There is absolutely no reason my dick is not in some chicks mouth
I hope you realize that its not me making that decision, but rather the combination of my genitals and sexual orientation
This is literally engraved into my seat "Need crack?" And then there's a number. This isn't real.
Are the transvestites working the counter tonight? Last time I was there they gave me love advice.
You need to stop vomiting in the washing machine, bro. For real this time.
Fireball goes down like mother's milk. Btw your housemate is naked
HE MIGHT HAVE YOUR BUTTHOLE, BUT HE CANT HAVE YOUR HEART. THATS MINE.
I'm about 40% drunk. You know, not drunk enough to light the bar on fire, but drunk enough to let the cougar hit on me.
I'm really busy with my period
Randomize
