I woke up this morning with my shirt on upside down.
You mean inside out.
No, upside down. I ripped the neck hole in the process of getting it around my waist.
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
thats it. im teaching my cat how to use a fire alarm
On a scale of your daily life to smuggling crack into the DR, how illegal is it?
I feel a bullet train of disappointment headed in your direction.
I have a huge bruise on my thigh that I am 95% sure is due to you repeatedly throwing me over couches.
So I got hit in the face with a frying pan. So def wont be at work for first break if I'm there at all
If it makes you feel any better, I had my finger up some guy's butt today... Dominatrix training, ya know...
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
some dude just accurately guessed my height and bra size.. that is cup AND inches around. creepy, yet impressive
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
Well I just found a coupon for cheese in the bathroom so I've got that going for me
I'm taking a shower and i'm gonna bring my pocketknife with me
oh.. my GOD my dad just text me... "i need a naked women" ........... help?
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