My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
so I think he was half asleep, but he woke me up by saying "where's my cow? Is it being shipped?" He must have been dreaming about farmville..
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
sorry i couldnt make it to your birthday last night. i admit i chose being a whore over you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think it's a friendship ring and the other part is on his cats collar
He rubs his penis on back when he think I'm sleeping
Her name means "flower that enlarges and gives birth." There is no way she isn't getting knocked up
And I would just like to take the time to say my boobs look great today.
Why do you think she gets more guys?
well her prof pic is her in her bedroom looking hot and mine is me looking terrified while holding a giant spider at 6 flags, so there's that
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Whiskey??
It will be at least another 6 weeks before I say yes again. I'm bruised. I stole sex cards and a really nice pocket knife. I acquired a vial of my own blood. Talk about a yard sale...
I think I hit my head on every surface in that apartment last night
Let's say hypothetically if you were going to put icing on a penis and then lick it clean...what would you ice it with? Not a knife right?
I'm in the ER bruh, I went skinny dipping last night and a cat fish bit my dick.
Found some boxer briefs on my patio table this morning surrounded by a case worth of empties. Starting to remember why I have rugburn and a sore asshole.
He couldn’t find my clit with a map. Literally. I drew him a map.
Randomize