But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
I can already tell this is gonna be one of those parties where we sit across the room and text about people.
Thank you for leaving pool of vagina on my girlfriends carpet.
That penis will go down in history. It's the Helen of Troy of dicks. I will conquer it and the tale will live on for future generations to learn from
I will give you all my nachos to make this happen
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
I'm having an emotional breakdown watching baby sloths on YouTube you need to come save me from myself.
I just finished a four mile round trip walk to CVS to buy shaving cream and lube. You're welcome.
I actually feel a twinge of sadness recycling all of our handles... I feel like I'm throwing out some great memories or lack of them because we don't remember
You wanna see what happens when frozen corn meets an unhappy Andrew's face?
Dude she passed out on the floor so you covered her with a blanket to make sure "no one would notice her"
And when she started moving around and making noises you told everyone, "it's okay, it's just my roomba under there".......
i'd like to schedule a penis for 4pm please.
While I was giving him head he told me he had to go door to door the next day and "spread the word of Jesus Christ" I felt like a Disney villain out to steal his virtue.
Is this making any sense, because I’m puking and trying to be Philosophical right now
just threw up in a gas staton parking lot in front of a father and son. stared them in the eyes and finished like a boss
Randomize
