just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
After skinny dipping in your pond, I think me and tequila have added a whole new dynamic to our relationship.
oh and if she happens to say anything about a cantalope and tissues... just go with it
I'm hoping he'll tell everyone how great in bed I am. Well, how great in bathroom floor I am.
I'm sooo hungover. I fell asleep on top of a car in a parking lot last night. New one to add to the list.
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
I feel like on the last day of finals we should run around campus dressed like Moses screaming "LET MY PEOPLE GO!!!!"
I'll start the recruiting
Last night I dressed up as a cowgirl and walked into McDonald's. I bought 20 mcribs. There's pictures
Happiness is having a 12 hour day thinking that there are only 2 beers in the fridge when you get home, but then finding 8. Fuck you Monday, this week I won.
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
My sweat smells like Wild Turkey. I'm really feeling the holiday spirit.
Does it get any better than dating a guy with a vasectomy? The answer is NO. No it does not
I've had your balls on my face a bunch of times so the least you could do is buy a girl some dinner.
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
He sent me the milestone first dick pic this morning, it looked like a baby's fist holding a tree trunk. I'm frightened and aroused in equal measure.
Randomize
