She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
she was screaming in french about how classy it was to be drinking wine. oh... she was drinking it out of the bottle. with a beer in her other hand while throwing up.
doctor said mango vodka does not count as my daily servings of fruit. damn.
Woke up naked wearing mismatched earrings. Didn't even make it to the bar.
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
Any residual attraction has just been ruthlessly murdered by that mustache.
Not at all! I'll let your potential employer know you have a huge dick
I'm literally in the bathroom for two minutes and I walk out to a random dude with his face in your tits
I can't wait to shower all this regret off of me
It's the kind of dick you travel across the country for
Found a trail of Taco Bell hot sauce packets through the garage to our back door and cheese in my bra. I'll say it was a successful Sunday Funday.
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
You know your late night booty call was a huge fail when you go back to your car after it's over, and it's still warm.
At least get laid and waffle fries out of it you whipped basterd
Randomize
